Last week we discussed how the Orthodox Jewish community has one of the lowest divorce rates of any people group. Because divorce is one of the greatest curses and most destructive forces in any society, I wanted to understand why this community was doing so much better than even the most devout Christian denominations and movements. The reason was easy to see, but it was surprising.

          A main reason why the Orthodox had such a low divorce rate was because they allow divorce. This sounds counter-intuitive until you understand it. The Law of Moses does allow for divorce, and they cannot change this without being guilty of changing the Law. So they developed a brilliant procedure for allowing divorce that would, if possible, bring reconciliation to marriages, and even end up strengthening them.

          Since the Orthodox community allows divorce, couples come to them for their divorce instead of divorce lawyers and divorce court. The Apostle Paul wrote to the Corinthians that it was to their shame that they went before the heathen for justice because there were no judges among them. Today, this remains the main source of shame for the body of Christ—going before the heathen for justice. The main way Christians do this is for divorce. This is because the doctrines of many Christian movements do not allow for divorce, so believers have no choice.

          Of course, Christian movements can have good reasons for these doctrines that they believe are based on Scripture. However, before addressing this, let’s go back to the Orthodox community and their remarkable success in preserving marriages.

          When a Rabbi blesses any union, whether it is a marriage or a business partnership, he is also expected to continue to pray for and seek to support this union. Any failure of something the Rabbi blessed is considered a personal failure for the Rabbi. This gives him even more impetus to pray for and keep in touch with the unions he blesses to be sure they are doing well and help them, if necessary. This is what elders in the church are also commissioned to do.

          Because a union is the Rabbi’s responsibility, if a couple resolves to divorce, they are required to go to the Rabbi who married them for the divorce. A process is then begun to conclude the divorce, but it is really a brilliant procedure for finding any possible way to reconcile the couple. It begins with reviewing the curses in Scripture that come upon those who break their vows. This is to ensure that the couple knows exactly what they are getting into. In most cases, the couple reconciles at this point, but if not, the process is thorough and almost all marriages are saved—except when there was one particular stronghold that the Orthodox found almost impossible to break—an addiction to pornography. 

          It seems that the greatest promises were given to the overcomers of Laodicea because they would have the most to overcome. It is probably much more difficult to overcome the lukewarm atmosphere in the church than it is to walk uprightly under persecution. We are also now living under an unprecedented onslaught of pornography and perversion. It is everywhere you turn. It will take the greatest love for God and one another to choose God and His will over the pervasive spiritual and moral corruption of our time.

          Pornography and impurity will kill your love for God, your love for your spouse, your love for your family, and even your life drive. It will make you a lukewarm underachiever at best. It will rob you of your relationship to God and your purpose in Him for which you were created.

          To keep our first love for God must be our most basic resolve. Our love for God is our greatest possession. It is greater than any treasure or anything we could ever attain and is the most important factor that determines if we have been successful in this life. We must all make a choice as to whether we will be controlled by the love of Christ as the great Apostle Paul wrote, or whether we will succumb to and be led into bondage by the spirit of this world.

          Even so, if you have been divorced, you have not committed the unpardonable sin. You can be reconciled to God, and you can recover your purpose in Him even if the divorce was your fault. This is not beyond the power of the cross to redeem.

          We must also acknowledge that many divorces are not the fault of one of the parties. You can be the best spouse possible and still suffer a divorce. We know this because we are told in Jeremiah 3 that God is divorced. We know this was not His fault and that He was the best husband there could ever be.

          Right now over 50% of Christians are no longer in the fellowship of a local church. It is just about the same percentage of those who have suffered divorce. The body of Christ must recover this group and heal the terrible wound that divorce causes, as well as the shame it has brought on the body of Christ. This must be a top priority if we are going to be a true witness of the coming kingdom. That kingdom is built on forgiveness, redemption, reconciliation, and restoration. There are different views, almost all of which have some merit to them, but we have to get this one right. This is a hole in the ship that will surely sink us if we don't.